The Playful Child Mode

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When the Playful Child Mode is activated, we have a general sense of contentment in our system because, at our core, emotional needs have been met. This is preferably something that is being done internally, however, meeting these needs externally is something that is helpful and, at times, definitely needed too. In this lighthearted and relaxed state, it feels comfortable for us to be playful, we feel at ease in our system, self-validated, connected, optimistic, competent, and most importantly, safe. Without a sense of safety, both externally and internally, our system is set on high alert, and the protective aspects of our emotional child parts, like anger and impulsivity for example, are not allowed to relax and enjoy the current moment we are in. Access to the many different aspects of the Playful Child mode is extremely necessary for us to engage in spontaneous and enjoyable activities, particularly in social settings.

“Understanding the role my Playful Child Mode needed to have in my personality system was integral to my success. I truly didn’t know how to play in a healthy way, and ultimately, this was stopping me from practicing Self-care!”

~Steven Morris RP

The absence of our ability to access this mode is possibly an indication that we were never allowed, or encouraged to play when we were young. As a result, we miss the early opportunities to explore our own individual likes and dislikes, and a crucial part of our development is skipped by not taking part in this fundamental form of social interaction. When needed, the Playful Child Mode provides an important counterbalance to what is often the emotionally painful experience of the Vulnerable Child, as early exposure to pleasure and joy can develop the skills of internal motivation. This provides the ability to access a sense of optimistic hope that things can and will get better in challenging times later on in adult life. The Playful Child Modes are at the centre of our system when we participate in many of the activities we need for Self-care, without them, many people will simply burn out as they never truly learn how to switch off from the stressors of their day-to-day activities.

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